So so rainy!

It is so rainy in Sacramento and that makes me happy! As I crawl under my blankets at night I get to hear the droplets of rain hitting my window, it is more soothing that just about anything. I have had a rough few days so this calming water all around is a welcome treat.

I've been doing quite a bit of thinking as of late. Wondering what exactly I am working toward in my time here. The truth is that as each day passes the day that Sally leaves us gets even closer, sure that is 9 months away but the older I get the more I realize that a month is truly no time at all. I can't help but wonder what Courtney and I will do with our extra room in our cozy home. Lately the thought of moving scares me. I know that I will not be leaving this place because it is here that I want to be, surrounded by all of these spectacular people that I love so much, people who make me a better person, happier and healthier and full. But I wonder if that is true for all of us. How long will this last?

It is a disease, I might even be justified in calling it a Stevens disease: cynicism. When times are awful I soak that up and when times are great all I can think of is how sad it will be when it is all over. I have been lucky enough to have some phenomenal times that cast out my cynicism but lately I am overwhelmed with premature grief. What to do?

Walk in the rain!

p.s. I got a digital camera for Christmas from my pops it is he who has made it possible for you to have a glimpse of my life much more quickly that my SLR allows...